...this makes my brain hurt...

So apparently, there's going to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Okay, looks interesting but the Turtles will be aliens.

Now, the fans have been told to "chill the fuck out", but I'm still scratching my head. Aliens? Really? I'm trying to wrap my brain around it all, but I'm failing miserably over here.

What Is This I Don't Even

Try wrapping your head around this one: The Secret World of Arrietty, a Studio Ghibli film about four-inch people who “borrow” what they need from normal-sized humans, encourages class envy and redistribution of wealth, according to Lou Dobbs.

The real kicker to all this? A direct quote from Dobbs: "The president's liberal friends in Hollywood targeting a younger demographic using animated movies to sell their agenda to children."

Um, excuse me, good sir? Hollywood has nothing to do with this! Let me spell this out for you--Arrietty is based on The Borrowers, which was a book published in 1952. Second of all, this was made by Studio Ghibli, which is based in Japan. Yes, Disney dubbed it and released it here in the US, but the film is Japanese in origin. So yeah, stop howling about Obama and the Hollywood liberals, please.

You know, I'm rather tempted to go and see Arrietty again, just to irritate people like this. Because I'm just that type.

--Weasel, "And people wonder why I'm so cynical. Well, here's just one example..."

COMMUNICATIONS INTERRUPT: TOO MANY DOG TAGS

WingTacker (thank Primus for the Multiforce; twelve W names with which I can run) has obviously been slacking off here. Understandable, I suppose; still filling notebooks with that horrendously illegible scrawl of hers (won't just buy the cheapest ones, either), spending moronic amounts of time looking for GTS Pokémon trades (it IS moronic when it's happening well after midnight and the alarm clock's gonna sound around 0700), mooning over the Brewers and the latest player to jump off the train (Jerry Hairston just signed with the Los Angeles Dodgers). Y'know. The usual.

Black Friday passed uneventfully for both of us. The 'open' times for stores poking into Thanksgiving late-night meant that all the nigh-solipsistic assholes, the nutbars who do all their holiday shopping then, and the people who were just looking for one or two deals and preferred not to risk missing out on 'em...they were pretty much all gone by 0300 Friday. WingTacker hadda be in at 0645. Fairly quiet shift. Me--I am a charter member of the third group listed above. No dues to pay this year, though--the entirety of Transformers offerings, this year, consisted of old stock, taped together and stickered with a fluorescent yellow SPECIAL VALUE starburst label. Shipped like that from Hasbro--I've seen the case boxes. Generally gotta put a little more effort into the repackaging to get me to bite.

So I stayed home and bought a Ninja. Hasn't arrived yet...

Took WingTacker to see Pokémon the Movie WHITE: VICTINI AND ZEKROM on Sunday. Limited engagements, bleh. Four whole theaters in Wisconsin showing it (once a day for two days), all in the Milwaukee area.

Whatever. I can drive that in my sleep BUT DIDN'T BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE IRRESPONSIBLE. Yomped around the area a little bit, afterward, hoping to find a Transformer that's been sighted in the state and is being snapped up about as quickly as its predecessor.

And BotCon just horked up the dates and location for the 2012 convention. Hopefully, Dallas in late April will be nothing like Dallas (Frisco, whatever, blah frickin' blah) in late September 2005. I'm missing DairyCon for the first time ever for this. Kinda sucks, but then, some of the behind-the-scenes drama is making me feel...somewhat less bad about it.

+++PRIME OUT+++C'EST LA VIE+++

...SLAG!...

Guess what I picked up on the plane? Give up? A SLAGGIN' HEAD COLD!

:slams head into a wall: Ah well. At least I got it after the 'Con and not during.

--Weasel, "Lucky me. But I still can't breathe..."

Friday Photoblog: "Aww, Come ON!" Edition

A shot of one of our trees, snow-covered (like everything else) from the late thundersnowstorm on 19 April. Pretty...
(...much gone now; yays. ARE WE DONE WITH THE SLAGGING SNOW NOW?!)

You're Supposed to be DONE!

Isn't it supposed to be spring? Yes? Okay then--WHY THE HELL IS THERE SIX INCHES OF SNOW IN MY DAMN YARD?! It's supposed to be over--finished!

I guess the hell not. Fucking winter.


Pic from here.

Friday Photoblog: "DAAAAAMMMMMMMIIIITTTT!!" Edition

Inside Bumblebee's Hall of Fame display case at BotCon 2010. Very self-explanatory.

(I probably won't have to fight a LEGION if this ever shows up on eBay,

but there's aaaalllways someone with a bigger slagging pocketbook, you know...)

Failure is Not an Option... It's Automatically Bundled with Windows

Just a word of caution--never assume that letting Windows Update run is going to turn out smooth as silk, peachy-keen, etc., etc.

I'm fine (now), Alexa One is fine (now),...sheesh.

--Weasel "Let's not have this shit happen again, okay?."

Technical Fucking Difficulties

Well, this is fucking awesome. I have to reformat the hell outta my work.

Yeah, I'm frickin' pissed. But big whoop. I can deal with this, I guess.

--Weasel, "I hate Terran technology. It sucks."

And Today in "What the Flying Fuck?!"

You know DA, I have to admit I'm seriously glad you're not going to SDCC this year.This is why.

Fred Phelps is going to Comic-Con. Can I get a "What the fuck?" here?!

His reasoning? Oh, it's stellar, trust me:

Are you kidding?! If these people would spend even some of the energy that they spend on these comic books, reading the Bible, well no high hopes here. They have turned comic book characters into idols, and worship them they do! Isaiah 2:8 Their land also is full of idols; they worship the work of their own hands, that which their own fingers have made: 9 And the mean man boweth down, and the great man humbleth himself: therefore forgive them not. It is time to put away the silly vanities and turn to God like you mean it. The destruction of this nation is imminent - so start calling on Batman and Superman now, see if they can pull you from the mess that you have created with all your silly idolatry.

You know something, Freddie boy? I haven't called out to your god in a very long time. The last time I did, I was in my twenties and your god did absolutely nothing to help me. He simply sat on his heavenly posterior and watched me squirm. So I quit calling to him, since it's obvious he won't fucking answer.

Instead, I have called out to HIM. HE has answered. HE has granted mercy. So tell me, Freddie boy: which god is truly real? The one from your holy tome or the one from the damned comic book? Because I will tell you, the one from the comic has been much more helpful than the one from your tome. Make of that as you will.

--Weasel, hell bound idol worshipper and damned proud.

Isn't That a Little Impossible?

So I just watched (and actually paid attention to) the trailer for that new Tom Cruise film Knight and Day. Looks like your typical action flick and it might be semi-interesting, if it weren't for the couch-jumping midget. But did anyone else notice that when Tom Cruise is kidnapping Cameron Diaz he says that he'll kill himself, then her?

Uh. Huh.

That's gotta be one helluva trick. I'd pay money to see that. It would probably be more entertaining than the stupid movie.

--Weasel, "If that were in the flick, it would be majorly awesome."

Are You Shitting Me?!

I did not just read this: Obama plan expands offshore oil drilling.

Awesome. Just fucking awesome. I've been down this road before--twenty years ago when I was living in NC. I fought like hell to make sure this bullshit wouldn't happen. We were able to dodge the bullet for a while but not anymore, it would seem.

They'll be drilling in Virginia. How long will it be before the Outer Banks are ruined? What are the chances Wrightsville Beach will end up spoiled? We all know spills have a tendency to spread out; like it or not this will affect NC. To hell with Michael Bay, this rapes my childhoods. I could absolutely cry.

Stop the world, I wanna get the fuck off. NOW.

Primus, am I ever glad I voted third party.


EDIT @ 1:08PM: CNN just showed us a nice big fat map of areas approved for offshore drilling. Guess who's on there? If you said the coast of North Carolina, you'd be right. (I just screamed at the television in abject rage when I saw that.) Godmotherfuckingdammit. Now I am going to go cry.

I'm Doomed! OMG!!111eleventymillion11!!

At least according to this article.

For those of you who don't want to click over to the fail, here's a rundown of some of the "gems" on the list:
Don't be smarter than your mate.
Don't have an "immature" hobby. (Action figures? Comic books? Video games? Oh no!)
Don't take a dump in front of each other. (Gotta maintain the "mystery", whatever the hell that means.)
Don't take separate vacays.
Don't have kids.
Don't have a big bed. (You totally need a cramped little twin sized bed so you can like cuddle and make out and stuff!)
Don't have a TV in the bedroom.
Don't change your appearance. At all. Ever.

Prime and I collect Transformers. Our hobby is the reason why we met. We had a big TV in our bedroom at one point... and used it to play video games. I dyed my hair red a few years ago. We sleep in a huge-ass king sized bed. And we just got married this year, after being together for damn near a decade. Yeah, we're seriously doomed. /sarcasm

--Weasel, "This just in, CNN fails. Film at whenthefuckever."

Dear Mattel,

You're the same toy company that has a huge problem with making any female action figures, yet you produce this?

Palm Beach Sugar Daddy Ken. Are you serious?!


I guess so. Wow.

But seriously, what the fuck? This looks like a freaking parody, not a legitimate collectible.

Maybe you guys should quit while you're ahead. Or take a cold shower. Or both. Me, I'm just gonna go slam my head against my brick fireplace until I pass out. Then maybe I'll think that this was just a bad dream.

Sincerely,

--Weasel

Stick a Fork in It, For I am DONE...

Michael Vick has signed with the Eagles.

Fuck football. I'll take a Brewers game anyday.

No Words. Seriously.

Found this little gem via Shakesville and I have to be honest, I can't do it justice. You really need to read this train wreck for yourself.

But this is what pisses me off the fucking most:

3) The fact that her parents talk about "having to do this now," as if a delusional nine-year-old cannot be told no;
(Emphasis mine)

Excuse me? But did you just call a dying girl delusional? A dying child? Delusional?! Where the fuck do you get off?! Trust me asshat, if this were your kid you'd give her whatever the flying fuck she would want. You sure as shit wouldn't call her dying wishes delusional. Yes, she wanted a fricking wedding, but so fucking what? Jesus Christ, I can't believe the amount of arrogance and idiocy I've just read.
Or to put it a better way:

Awesome, we're now concern trolling the dying wishes of a 9 year old.

Yeah, awesome job. Way to look like a total douche.

If this is "true Feminism" then fuck it. I officially jump ship.

Like It Can't Get Any Damn Stupider....

I didn't think much of what I saw; one of the heads was wiping down our dry erase board at the podium just as I arrived. It wasn't until later that things got serious. It seems the note on the board read that all cashiers were required to smile. If we didn't we could get coached. Or worse.

We could get fired. For not smiling on the job.

It was either someone's idea of a joke or they were deadly serious about it. And I'm thinking it wasn't a joke.

The news spread like wildfire. No one was happy. Which is probably why the damn thing was erased.

This whole thing leads me to ask: Could management get fired for being stupid as fuck? Cause they seriously need it.

--Weasel, "And I was hoping to use my 'psycho' smile..."

Hotel Hopping, Mark Two

So Fun Pub announced the hotel details for BotCon on New Year's Eve.

The Wednesday through Monday block filled within two hours. We're looking at doing the hotel shuffle. Again. It's shades of 2007.

Small price to pay. Whatever it takes to get to the 'Con, I'll do it.

--Weasel "Now the wait until May.... that'll be a pain in the ass."

Best Cashmas Gift Ever

This past Saturday was the busiest shopping day of the season. We were crammed to the gills with customers, most of them pretty cranky. I was bracing myself for what would be a horrible day when one of my former co-workers spotted me. We said hello and chitchatted for a bit. Then she dropped a bit of news from the old workfront:

S got fired. The bitch that made my life a living hell finally got fired.

I went through the day with a huge smile on my face. It couldn't have happened to a more deserving person.

I Work With Idiots

But then again, what else is new?

Nearly tore out my hair on Thursday: Someone brought up a shower head with a clearance sticker on it. The sticker said $9.00 but it was meant for toys (Dept 7) and the shower head in question came up $27.88. So I called Hardware and asked them about it. The guy working back there said that it was not a clearance item and the 27.88 price was correct. I tell the customer this. She demands a head cashier. I explain everything. He takes off. When he comes back he says that I have to override it, per Tom.

You remember Tom, right? The fucking idiot dickhead? Yeah, not only is he a lousy manager but he just cost our fucking store damn near twenty bucks. And there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it. It seems as long as the items is marked with a clearance tag I have to sell it at clearance price no matter what.

Fast forward to last night. Seems the person working in stationary was redoing an endcap and didn't change the sign. So I sold four (or was it six?) Crayola Light Writers for $1.88. They actually retail for $19.97. If management pisses about it, too fucking bad. I saw the sign myself and considering the night before, why fucking try to do the right thing?

I'd scream, but I can't do it loud enough and I'd just ruin my voice anyway. There's no damn point.